i saw his friend's car in the parking lot and i instantly felt attacked- that fiery yellow color, boasting of the stings that lay ahead, just thirty feet in front of me. we walked into the lobby of the smokey cafe, i tried to hang out there, avoiding this inevitable crash of emotions. i poured myself a cup of coffee, in hopes of dilluting the nervous vibrations i felt hanging in the rafters above me. but my friend grabbed my arm and shoved me to the nearest table. the orange walls and grunge art did little to put me at ease. i was feeling a world of turmoil building up in my stomach. i scanned the room, hoping it'd be just a sea of strangers. but alas, i was met with that unfriendly face - the face of the.. exboyfriend.
the reminder of all things heartbreaking and earth-shattering. he had a new girl on his lap. some abercrombie blonde with empty eyes and a pretentious smile. i looked away. i'd rather jump out of a moving vehicle going 90mph on a busy chicago highway than meet eyes with him. i'd rather roll over dead in my grave than give him the validation he'd been looking for. i didn't miss him. i didn't even care. i just didn't want him at MY coffee shop. on MY turf. i thought when we split, he knew i got full rights to this place. him and his small pervvy penis were not welcome here. or in my life. i thought he knew that's what i meant when i said "goodbye."
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